Finally!

I finally got around to seeing those men with the giant hedge-clippers and barrels of acid to perform that lucrative surgery I've been needing. I can't feel my legs, but I am sure it will pass!

A short story by yours truly:

today on mythbusters we are gonna crack the myth that a woman can only make one guy cum at once and to do that we are gonna all fuck kari byron at once. adam savage took his red haired disgusting meat pole and stuck it up kari's anus and began thrusting while jamie heineman took out his dick which was also bald with a beret and mustache and stuck it up her red haired cunt. torey or corey or whatever that other guy's name is stuck his jew dick in her slopping mouth and grabbed her fine small tits. grant couldn't do much because he had a nonexistance asian penis so he stood there and kari tried to stroke it but got carpal tunnel syndrome very quickly. then adam and corey both shot their jazz into kari but jamie was boring and uninterested by everything so he was unable to shoot any sperm. kari got out buster and dropped it from five stories up onto jamies package and he shot out a typhoon of man juice. THIS MYTH IS BUSTED DEFINITELY kari said as she tried to swim through the overflow of bald man spunk

I wrote it while a small Latino man sewed the words "BIG BOPPIN" into my forearm with cinnamon dental floss in a procedure that costs well over forty thousand dollars.

Re: It's now safe to say the PS3 days of glory has officialy started!!!

WHOMPEM

I EXPERIMENTED TODAY!

I tried drinking the confounded tap water and it made my mouth dry up like a prune along with a raging erection for 12 hours and the unbelievable urge to smash my head into a television set while it played crime dramas.

WHAT A VACATION THIS TURNED OUT TA BE!!! AHOO!!

Sometimes...

I am taking a dump and think about myself as a person and I start to hate myself for different decisions I have made, then I remember I am an overall better person than at least 90% of people.

Thanks 90%, you keep me going.